Emotionally intelligent people often have an upper hand in life because they don’t let their feelings run the show.
They don’t get rattled easily, and they seem to have a good grip on themselves no matter what’s happening around them.
But how exactly do they manage this? What behaviors do they avoid to stay happy and grounded?
Let’s go through the 10 things emotionally intelligent people typically don’t do.
1. They Don’t Assume Their Feelings Are the Whole Truth
Emotionally intelligent people realize that how they feel isn’t always how things really are. Just because you’re upset doesn’t mean your perception is 100% accurate.
Feelings are signals, not facts.
So, instead of jumping to conclusions based on feelings alone, they pause, and try to objectively assess how exactly they feel and why.
This mindset helps them avoid unnecessary conflicts. Emotions fluctuate, and feelings can be influenced by both external factors and memories.
By not assuming their feelings define reality, they’re able to stay grounded.
2. They Know Their Happiness Comes From Within
Emotionally intelligent people understand that they can’t rely on others to keep them happy.
Their peace and stability don’t depend on what anyone else does or says. Instead, they cultivate their own sense of peace and contentment.
This doesn’t mean they’re indifferent to their environment – only that they don’t let outside circumstances dictate how they feel.
They work on their self-awareness so that they can find fulfillment in themselves.
When you rely on yourself to be happy, you become less vulnerable to unpredictable external events and other people’s moods.
3. They’re Open to Discovering What Truly Makes Them Happy
Emotionally intelligent people don’t assume they already know what will make them happy.
They’re curious and willing to explore new ideas and experiences. Happiness isn’t a fixed destination; it’s a discovery and a journey.
They’re also not afraid to step out of their comfort zones to find out what truly fulfills them.
They listen to their inner voice rather than following societal expectations. This openness keeps life exciting and meaningful.
It also allows them to adapt when something that used to make them happy no longer does.
They’re always evolving and discovering what really brings them joy.
4. They Don’t Take Fear as a Sign They’re on the Wrong Path
Feeling scared or reluctant about something isn’t automatically a sign you’re headed the wrong way.
Emotionally intelligent people understand that fear is often part of change. It’s normal to feel uncomfortable when stepping into the unknown.
Instead of fear stopping them, they see it as a signal that they’re stretching themselves and doing something meaningful.
They’re able to tolerate discomfort because they understand it’s a temporary state and a sign that they’re moving forward.
They don’t always label fear as a red flag. They acknowledge it and choose to act despite it.
5. They Believe in Their Power to Choose Happiness
Happiness isn’t always luck or circumstance – it’s often a choice. Emotionally intelligent people recognize that they have the power to make it.
Though they might not control what happens around them, they do have control over how they respond.
Instead of blaming external factors and other people, they take responsibility and switch to a positive outlook.
They stay focused on the things they pode control – their reactions and attitude.
This empowers them to create their own happiness, even when the conditions aren’t ideal. They choose agency over victimhood.
When you realize that you hold the keys to your emotional well-being, living more intentionally becomes possible.
6. They Don’t Let Intrusive Thoughts Control Them
Our minds are filled with endless thoughts – many of them complete nonsense – and emotionally intelligent people know they don’t have to believe everything they think.
They’re able to observe their thoughts without judgment and recognize that many are just assumptions.
This helps them not to get caught up in negative or anxious thinking patterns that spiral out of control.
Instead, they’re able to choose which thoughts to entertain and take seriously.
They understand that thoughts are not facts, and that they have the power to change their perspective. This mental discipline is at the center of emotional intelligence.
7. They Don’t Pretend to Be Okay When They’re Not
Sometimes, people think that maintaining a composed face is a sign of strength, but emotionally intelligent people understand the importance of being honest with themselves.
They don’t hide their true feelings or pretend everything’s fine.
They choose to acknowledge how they feel even when it’s uncomfortable. Pretending to be okay can easily lead you to bottle up your emotions, which isn’t helpful.
Instead, accept your feelings, process them, and then choose how to respond.
In order to truly get a grip on your thoughts and feelings, you need to allow yourself to really experience them.
8. They Don’t Overreact to Bad Emotions
Everyone experiences negative feelings from time to time, but emotionally intelligent people don’t blow things out of proportion.
They understand that feelings are temporary signals.
Instead of overreacting or making impulsive decisions, they know when to pause and think it through. They acknowledge the feelings and let it pass naturally.
This prevents small issues from turning into serious problems. Feelings come and go.
By not overreacting, they maintain control, which helps them handle life more effectively.
9. They Recognize That a Bad Day Doesn’t Mean a Bad Life
Feeling down or upset doesn’t automatically mean your whole life is doomed.
Emotionally intelligent people understand that negative emotions are normal, and that they’re temporary.
They don’t let a bad feeling define their entire experience. Instead, they see these feelings as a sign that something has to change.
They’re self-compassionate, and they understand that everyone is going through something.
Life is a mix of highs and lows, so don’t allow your bad mood to spiral into a bad life.
Understanding that it’s all part of our natural experience helps us stay hopeful and resilient.
10. They’re Selective About Who They Let Close
Not everyone deserves a seat at your table. Emotionally intelligent people are careful about who they trust and let into their inner circle.
When it comes to relationships, they value quality over quantity.
Close friends should be supportive and honest, no exceptions. That’s why these people don’t open up to just anyone.
Having this boundary helps them protect their well-being and ensures that they surround themselves with uplifting people.
This kind of attitude doesn’t make you judgmental. It just means that you prioritize long-term, genuine connections.
A little Aquarius, devoted to writing and embroidery. Through my writing, I hope to empower readers to align with their true selves and navigate life’s mysteries with confidence.