Authority isn’t defined only by your job title or your status; it can be felt by how you communicate. The words you use influence how your audience views your level of confidence, credibility, and ability to lead.
Many people lose their authority inadvertently through word choices that indicate either doubt or insecurity. These types of statements may seem harmless or kind, but they will ultimately erode confidence and trust in who you are.
Making a shift in how you are using these phrases will change the way that your audience responds to you. Below are 10 frequent phrases used by an individual that help diminish their authority.
1. “I’m Not Sure, But…”
The phrase “I’m not sure…” raises concern that the speaker is less competent than the other person and, therefore, should not be trusted as a source of information.
Therefore, it diminishes the credibility of the idea. In addition, the focus of the audience will be on the doubt and not on the message being conveyed.
When a speaker conveys doubt, it will also call into question the ability of the speaker to provide valuable information.
The speaker may intend to sound humble by using this phrase, but in reality, they are transmitting the message that they are lacking in confidence. Authority and clarity are essential to expressing openness and confidence.
2. “This Might Be a Stupid Question.”
If you call your own question dumb, you lose credibility when you ask it, before anyone even gets the chance to respond. You have shown others how to treat your thoughts.
Even a smart question loses its worth when you frame it this way. By saying this, you are indicating that you are afraid of being judged. In order to be authoritative, you have to have self-respect.
When you ask a question with confidence, it demonstrates curiosity and leadership on your part. You do not need to apologize for asking questions that help you learn something new.
This type of behavior will gradually erode how other people view your intelligence and confidence over time.
3. “I Could Be Wrong.”
Although openness in expression carries value, using this phrase frequently undermines authority because it conveys a lack of belief in your own decision-making ability.
Therefore, as an individual, if you use these phrases too frequently, people may begin to doubt your decisions. The only way an individual can demonstrate confidence in their final decisions is to rely on themselves while taking into consideration the opinions of others.
The continued use of self-doubt creates doubt in others.
4. “Sorry to Bother You.”
This phrase indicates you’re inconvenient, and it makes you seem less valuable in conversations.
It also communicates that your needs or ideas are unimportant, even if you’re being polite. Knowing that you deserve a place and attention is having authority. You can respect others while not apologizing for existing.
Over time, people will learn to prioritize you less because of this phrase. Self-esteem is the root of confidence.
5. “I’m Just Saying”
The phrase discredits your words because it weakens your message. Using this phrase demonstrates that you are not sure if you agree with your own statements.
Having authority means taking ownership of what you say and believe in.
Avoid the phrase because it communicates that you are not confident in what you are saying. Being an effective communicator requires clarity, not distance.
6. “Maybe We Could…”
Using this phrase confuses and softens suggestions/ideas. It is possible to give others an opportunity to gain feedback without giving them the impression that you are not sure about your actual suggestion.
People will stop trusting your idea(s) because you have created the impression that the suggestions you make are not the best.
7. “Does That Make Sense?”
Frequently asking this could come across as you having a lack of confidence because it puts the weight on the other person rather than trusting your ability to communicate.
You should always speak your words clearly and convey messages directly. The repeated use of this phrase has the effect of creating doubt in those around you.
Those who are strong communicators always trust their message.
8. “I Guess.”
The sentence “I guess” implies indecision. It gives the appearance of being random or not deliberate when making your decision.
Authority needs to be able to make decisions firmly. Even little decisions can sound very firm by removing phrases like “I guess” from your choice of words.
Your usage of language creates perceptions for others.
9. “I Don’t Want to Be Rude, But…”
Listeners may prepare for conflict with this phrase, which may also create a position of weakness. It suggests a fear of confrontation. Being honest is something you should own up to.
You can be direct and respectful at the same time. Often, before your message even starts, this phrase will weaken your message’s power or meaning.
You will create more confidence with clear boundaries. Using this phrase will hinder effective communication.
10. “Whatever You Think Is Best.”
Flexibility is important; however, if you are always flexible, it makes it sound as if you are not engaged in the conversation and decision-making.
It gives the perception of indifference and/or not having an opinion. Authority implies both participation and leadership, but continuously defaulting to the opinion of others on decisions will decrease your influence.
Balanced leadership is open as well as directional.
Born and raised in Bosnia and Herzegovina. Ever since I was a little girl, my imagination knew no bounds. I remember vividly how I’d scribble down short stories, each page bursting with adventures and characters conjured up from the whimsy of my mind. These stories weren’t just for me; they were my way of connecting with my friends, offering them a slice of my fantasy world during our playtimes. The joy and excitement on their faces as we dived into my fictional realms motivated me to keep writing. This early passion for storytelling naturally evolved into my pursuit of writing, turning a childhood hobby into a fulfilling career.