Friendship – something that sounds so simple, but at the same time can be incredibly complex.
We all long for genuine, reliable friendships, but sometimes we realize that not everyone who has called us “friend” really means it.
In today’s world, false friends are unfortunately not uncommon. They disguise themselves well, hiding their true intentions, and it often takes us a while to realize that we’ve been taken advantage of.
But before you get too overwhelmed by doubt, there are clear signs that can help you recognize a fake friend.
It’s not always easy to read these signs, because fake friends are masters at hiding their true faces.
But if you listen to your gut and take the following warning signs seriously, you can better assess the people in your life and protect yourself from toxic friendships.
1. they only get in touch when they need something
Do you know this? Your phone rings – and it’s that one friend who hasn’t contacted you for weeks.
Funnily enough, he only ever turns up when he wants something from you. Maybe he needs your help, your time or even money.
You may be happy to hear from him at first, but when you realize that it’s never really about you, but always about his needs, it becomes clear that something is wrong.
A real boyfriend is interested in your life, your thoughts and feelings, not just when he wants something from you.
If you notice that there is a lack of interest in you and that it’s only ever about their needs, you should reconsider this “friendship”.
2. they are never there when you need them
Friendships thrive on give and take. But if you feel like you’re always giving while your friend is never there when you really need them, that’s a clear sign.
A real friend stands by your side, especially in difficult times.
Whether you’re in pain or just need someone to talk to – true friends make it possible.
A fake friend, on the other hand, will always find an excuse. Suddenly they are too busy or “don’t have time right now”.
But if they’re in a crisis themselves, they expect you to be there immediately. This kind of one-sidedness is toxic and harms you in the long term.
3. they don’t begrudge you your successes
A good friend is happy with you about your successes, no matter how big or small they are.
They see your happiness as their own and support you wherever they can.
But a fake friend? He will try to belittle your successes or even talk badly about them behind your back.
Jealousy is one of the clearest signs that someone doesn’t have your best interests at heart.
If you notice that someone doesn’t celebrate your success, but rather makes you feel like you’re standing in their way, then you’re probably dealing with a fake friend.
4. they constantly criticize you
Constructive criticism is something that should have a place in any genuine friendship.
But if your friend is constantly talking negatively about you, rubbing your nose in your mistakes and belittling you, you should watch out.
Fake friends often want to make you feel insecure because it gives them a sense of power.
Real friends support you in becoming the best version of yourself – they encourage you and help you to develop without questioning your worth.
5. they try to manipulate you
Manipulative friends are dangerous because they are often very adept at making you feel guilty or pushing you into situations you don’t want to be in.
They exploit your weaknesses and twist your words until you believe you’re in the wrong – even when you’re actually in the right.
If you feel like someone is trying to control you or make you feel like you’re always doing something wrong, it’s time to think about whether this friendship is good for you.
6. they make you look bad – especially in front of others
Have you ever experienced a friend embarrassing or belittling you in front of others?
Maybe in a supposedly “funny” tone, but it feels anything but fun?
This is a clear sign that this person is not a real friend.
Real friends defend you even when you’re not around and never intentionally make you look bad.
If someone does the opposite, you should ask yourself why you still have this person in your life at all.
7. you often feel drained after meetings
A meeting with a good friend should energize you, cheer you up and leave you feeling good.
But if you often feel exhausted, annoyed or empty after a meeting with a “friend”, it could be because this person is taking more from you emotionally than they are giving.
False friends often sap your energy without you even realizing it.
They spread negativity and leave you feeling bad. This is another clear sign that this friendship is doing you more harm than good.
8. they don’t support your dreams
A true friend will always support you – even if they don’t necessarily agree with you.
But a fake friend will talk down your dreams and goals, making you feel like you can’t do it.
They often do this because they are insecure themselves and can’t stand it when others are successful.
Friendships should encourage you, not hold you back. If you notice that someone is constantly trying to sabotage your plans or discourage you, that’s a huge red flag.
9. they don’t keep their promises
Promises are an essential part of any friendship.
But if you keep finding your friend breaking their promises or making excuses as to why they couldn’t keep something, you should ask yourself how seriously this person takes your friendship.
Of course, anyone can make a mistake or forget something – but if this becomes a habit, it shows that you’re not a priority to this person.
10. they constantly bring drama into your life
Some people thrive on drama – and they drag it into every relationship, including friendships. If you notice that you’re constantly being dragged into unnecessary arguments or drama that really has nothing to do with you, that’s a clear sign.
A real friend won’t drag you into their personal dramas, but will instead try to bring peace to the friendship.
Of course! I’ll reword the paragraphs to make them more flowing, personal and empathetic at the same time:
How to deal with a fake friend
Now that you know the signs of a fake friend, the question is: how do you deal with it? It’s not always easy, but here are a few tips to help you:
1. address the problem openly
Sometimes the key to resolving a conflict is to talk about it.
Sit down with your boyfriend and talk calmly about what’s on your mind.
He may not even be aware of his behavior – or he may not have meant it that way.
An open, honest conversation can create the opportunity to clear up misunderstandings and perhaps even save your friendship.
Stay calm and try to express your feelings clearly and objectively without making accusations.
2. set clear boundaries
It is important that you know and protect your personal boundaries in every relationship – including friendships. Don’t allow yourself to be manipulated or taken advantage of.
If you notice that your boyfriend is overstepping your boundaries, you should tell him clearly what is unacceptable to you.
By setting boundaries, you show that you respect yourself and that you are prepared to stand up for your own needs.
This often leads to the other person either reflecting on their behavior and changing it – or distancing themselves when they realize that they can no longer simply walk over you.
3. consider ending the friendship
As painful as it may be, sometimes you have no choice but to end a toxic friendship.
If you feel like the relationship is doing you more harm than good, then it may be time to let go.
Your emotional and mental well-being should always come first.
Even though it’s hard to let go of someone you’ve considered a friend for a long time, sometimes it’s the only way to find inner peace and make room for healthy, sincere relationships.
Conclusão
Friendships should energize, inspire and support you.
If you find that someone in your life is doing the opposite – draining your energy, manipulating you or dragging you down – then it’s time to think about that friendship.
It can be hard to break up with a false friend, but you’ll be better off in the long run if you rid yourself of that negativity.
You deserve to be surrounded by people who value you and wish you the best – and nothing less.
Sempre senti uma forte ligação com o Divino desde o meu nascimento. Como autora e mentora, a minha missão é ajudar os outros a encontrar o amor, a felicidade e a força interior nos momentos mais sombrios.